Waiting for My Divine Love

Peace beloveds. As always, I hope that this post finds you well. I have been feeling the angst of singleness lately and wanted to share a few things.

One of my desires is to love, deeply, safely, and intensely. I would love to share space and time with someone. But, after many failures, I had recently locked this particular desire away, deciding to instead focus on my healing, growth, and evolution. I have not made the best decisions when it comes to entering into relationships, seeing their potential instead of their truth. And it has been damaging. I have been broken more times than I wish to say, harmed, abused, ignored– you name it.

Although I had entertained the thought of trying again, I am back to square one after being disappointed yet again. So, I said bump it– I. AM. DONE. I expressed my pain to a friend and she brought me a new perspective over the weekend. She put it to me like this–have you ever thought that spirit made them move away from you because they are not worthy? She expressed how important my walk is in this life and how it will take a very special person to support me in my goddesshood. She explained how in our motherland, the healers are often single because they could not find a partner who could handle the mantle that they carried in life. She expressed that my person has to be worthy of me and understand and accept the sacred work that I do.

I sat and meditated on this for a few hours. I know that I had not done anything for the inconsistency that I had received. And I heard spirit say that some of these men are seeking whom they can devour. It rattled me deep inside of myself. I had one particular person continually speak about my energy. I now feel deep down that is was not me at all that they were attracted to but to the energy and the light that I bring into the world. and have

So, I have decided to just allow space. When the time comes, my divine mate will make an appearance. Until then, I shall love me through and through. I shall dance, sing, paint, mother, divine, just be. I will love the hell out of my life until he shows himself true. See you all soon!

Peace,
-Ashaki

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