Celebrating Junior

Peace & blessings fam! Seems like it has been eons since I have written but I write everyday, I just do not always blog it, post it, or even put pen to paper. Anyway, my life has changed so much over the last few months—from losing a brother, deciding to bring some things to a close, turning age (36!!), and beginning a new business. I am learning more and more about myself and it is not always easy to look at yourself and love yourself inside and out. Anyway, tomorrow is a very special day. It is the day my baby brother would have turned 33 years old.

It is hard to believe that my brother transitioned from this life 23 years ago, exactly 6 days before his 11th bEarthday. I sometimes can see glimpses of him in my two youngest sons- from the smirk on my baby’s face that he has worn from almost birth to the need to be outdoors as much as humanly possible that my 7-year-old exhibits. My brother is ever present. Memories of him have not faded and some are more distinct than others.

One of my favorite memories of my brother was from a few weeks before his transition. My mother used to work the late shift so he and I would be home alone a lot even during his sickness. Anyway, he and I would watch movies until bedtime. He began to tell me how he knew he was dying and that he knew we were trying to hide the truth from him. I felt tears well up in my eyes and I thought he couldn’t feel my pain because I was dying inside myself. I had just had to bury my father after he was killed in a work related accident and my brother was nearing his time. There was no joy to be felt during that time. I felt very hopeless. And then, my brother helped ease my heart. He told me that I should not be sad because he was not afraid and he was ready to die. He said that each time he closed his eyes angels were there telling him that he was going to be just fine. He told me that he knew that this was just another beginning and that he would not know pain in his new life. I did not understand then, but I fully understand now and my understanding took years.

So, on March 23rd, 1995, my youngest brother, Donald Lovette Johnson Jr. , left his cancer striken 10 year old body and transcended into his new life. He left all the illness, pain, and heartache here on Earth. His spirit lives on no doubt. My brother loved “18 wheelers” (as he called them), riding his red Huffy bicycle, playing outside, and playing NBA Jams. My brother survived having a stroke at 2, brain surgeries, and multiple seizures to live to the ripe age of 10. My brother once kicked my ass for not letting him watch Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. My brother, who would try to follow me on his bike as I rode mine to my friends’ house and get mad and yell “I’m telling Mama!!” when I wouldn’t let him come. My brother, who knows my secrets, knows life behind the doors of our home, and who I kept safe from knowing more than I felt he could handle. My brother, who we called Junior, left an indelible mark upon my life. I am braver, stronger, more loving, more forgiving, and more grateful for life because of him. So, happy happy bEarthday Junior. Your sister loves you eternally……. March 29th will forever be your day so get ready for cake, a nice plate of food, and other offerings….most of all my love.

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

“Andre’a”

Beginning Again…

Peace everyone. It has been quite some time since my last post and for so many different reasons. I have lost a dear loved one, started a new business (which is soon to launch), among other things. I titled this post “Beginning Again” because that is literally what I am having to do at this point in time.

About six weeks ago I joined a business bootcamp. Now, on the surface, it appeared to be solely business based but what I found along the way is that I had to confront my life at its current state. I had to come to the realization that I was not totally clear on what I wanted and once I gained clarity, I knew a lot had to change. Change is not always easy, desired, or painless.

For most of my adult life, I have been someone’s wife and then I was in another serious relationship soon after my marriage ended. I have never had to truly be alone since I was about 22 years old and even then, I had long relationships for the most part. Now, I have to deal with Ashaki– her quirks, her longings, her feelings. It has been emotional but also enlightening.

I just celebrated a bEarthday on March 15th and last weekend I took myself out of town for the weekend. I enjoyed my stay in a lavish hotel, eating beautiful food, getting a massage, and napping to the sound of the ocean. I learned that I am a “company addict”.  I am not the “be alone” type if that makes sense even though I have been feeling that I want to be alone for a while. Anywho, I came to the realization that is not truly the company that I desire but rather the distraction from being with myself.

And so life is beginning–again. I am restructuring everything as I must. And this journey may be arduous but at the end I will be rewarded. No I am not speaking in terms of anything monetary, but I will gain a greater understanding of who I am, what kind of stuff I am made of, and also what I have to offer to the world. I would love to be a wife again someday but for now, let me just learn to be a friend and lover to myself.

 

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

 

 

Short and Sweet

Peace, love, and light fam. It is the day of love for many. A day filled with cards, candies, flowers, and stuffed bears, candlelight dinners, overcrowded restaurants, and booked hotel rooms. And although I do not celebrate Valentine’s Day, I choose to reflect on loves in my life and the overall overwhelming energy of the day. I will definitely be carrying my rose quartz crystal on my person today (lol). Anywho, I wanted to share a poem I wrote some time ago about the flirtations of new love……

Eyes met and that was a wrap
What can I say?
You got it like that
Have me giddy
Blushing and shit
A wink does me in
Boy you need to quit!
When you ask me , I will come
When you need me, I will do
Let it be you for me and me for you
As headstrong as I am
As stubborn and as proud
I am putting it all aside
Hanging it up
Cause I know you won’t let
My mess slide
Your strength is my weakness
My dearest love
My most worthy opponent
We fit together perfectly
The best matched components

 

Have a beautiful day, whether you celebrate or not, love is and always will be an undeniable force.

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

Be Open

Peace, love, and light fam and happy happy Saturday! I hope you all are well, peaceful, and enjoying your weekend. I wanted to take time to share a word with you that seems to be a defining word in my life pattern—change. I used to be very change averse. I did not want to deviate from what was usual in my day and anything that occurred outside of what usually did caused me much heartburn. I mean my attitude would go from Sunnyside up to El Nino lol!

But, now I realize being fluid and open to change is so much more rewarding and allows for me to experience more abundance and overall inner peace. I have said in the past that we should embrace change as a friend, even though change is often difficult. Over the past six months, so much has happened that has not been what most people would feel is good or positive. And I am still going through a lot. However, instead of focusing on the uncomfortableness of this situation, I am taking it all in as lessons. I have found more strength to be with myself. We often run from ourselves, choosing to remain in relationships so as not to be confronted with the truth of who we are. I see myself, flaws and all, and I love her. She has grown much and still is.

I encourage you to find your silver lining. Even though the tears, hurt feelings, the overall pruning experienced through change. I listened to a dear SiStar explain the process diamonds and gems go through before being sold. They must be buffed and shaved and polished in order to shine as brightly as they can. So, as the diamond is cut, so must we be. Do not be afraid to allow your light to shine. Each trial, tribulation, and lesson is buffing you and bringing you into the fullness of your own brilliant inner light. Shine on! Embrace change. Sometimes the best things in life come from what we may feel is unnecessary change. Be open and receive.

Be Your Awesome Self!

Peace peace everyone! I do hope you are enjoying your day/week.  I must admit that this week has been quite challenging and I have had to put my spiritual practices to work in order not to fall into a depression. I know that this is a blog but it is also my diary and I feel comfortable enough within my space and self to keep it all the way funky.

I have said it before and I will say it again, family is NOT defined by blood, meaning that I have family is of no blood relation to me and I have relatives that are not family. It is a very bitter pill for me as I have always, always had a huge amount of love for my blood family. However, I am seeing that my feelings are not going to be reciprocated from some of them and I just have to swallow it and not allow it to make me bitter. I have been ostracized for embracing my cultural roots, for stepping away from tradition that was not serving my higher purpose, for shunning faith for facts, for speaking on injustice, for changing how I eat, even for teaching my children Yoruba phrases (if you can believe that one!).

And the relatives in which I am referring to are quite close, not like a 2nd cousin, twice removed or anything. But, you know what? It is their loss. I am an awesome person and I am not saying that to sound big headed. I have overcome so much and still maintain a high level of integrity and humbleness. I have done great work in my community and am continuing to do so. I am also nowhere near to being done with my self-work. I am working on becoming my greatest version daily.

So, why do I share with you my business? Because I am sure that someone in your family or even friend groups who has treated you poorly for no apparent reason other than you being you. Because most of us have felt like the black sheep at some point (some of us more than others). But mostly because I want to let you know that you are awesome as well! And do not allow anyone to tell you any different. The messages that others give us about what is supposedly wrong with us can sabotage us, stunt our growth, and cause us to give up before we have even begun—often without us even knowing. The subconscious mind is mighty indeed! The things they have said use to play repeatedly in my mind but no more! I changed the tape. Remember we are creators and we have control. We must write our own stories. If someone else has the pen, snatch it from their damn hands!  So, from this day forward, I want you to look in the mirror into your eyes and say “I am enough”. Simple right? Simple and yet poignant. You are absolutely enough! Have a beautiful day….

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

We Need a Revolution

Peace and love to the fam on this beautiful (though little gloomy) morning. Man oh man, what a turn of events we are experiencing at this time. Donald J Trump is president. I never thought I would be typing that but it is true. I did not partake in watching the festivities on yesterday because to be honest I have absolutely no desire to do so and really am not concerned with him at all.
I recently created a video on my YouTube channel discussing why people should not concern themselves with his election and focus more on their local government and their homes. I still feel the same way. This next statement may make some people be angry, unfollow me, even curse me but in my opinion, Barack Obama did no more for black people than any other president.

He made many, many, many statements in support of law enforcement when we all know the overseers, I mean officers of the law have been attacking and murdering our people like never before, with no recourse. He even signed into law the “Blue Alert Law”, a law that specifically protects police officers. He has helped many segments of people in America, including transgender and even Jews. The one action that I have seen him take that has affected the Afrikan community in Amerikkka is his commutation of sentences of non-violent drug offenders. But, I honestly feel that there is something to that action and not all positive. Nevertheless, his time in office is over and now we have Trump at the helm.

Historically, Amerikka has not served Afrikan people well at all. We were viewed as property, brainwashed beyond belief, and still have issues from all that has been done, even though some of us have family that were here before the Europeans. The presidents of Amerikka are in place to maintain the corporation. We that live here must learn to navigate effectively within this system because whether we want to believe it or not, we are a part of it. Change come not through focusing on what we have no control over, but by working on issues that we absolutely do have control over. Revolution begins in the mind. Many of us are sick, mentally ill, and delusional. The most important work one could ever do is on self. Everything else will align once we break the chains off the brains! We have way to many niggas and not enough gods!

My challenge to my people is to do the work that you can within your own community. We have more power than we realize and working on self and our immediate environment is of utmost important. Doing worthwhile work with others working towards liberation is highly important. In the words of Assata Shakur “we need a revolution of the mind. we need a revolution of the heart. we need a revolution of the spirit. the power of the people is stronger than any weapon. a people’s revolution can’t be stopped. we need to be weapons of mass construction. weapons of mass love. it’s not enough just to change the system. we need to change ourselves. we have got to make this world user friendly. user friendly.”

 

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

Moving Forward

Peace, peace. I do hope this post finds you well. This weekend has been quite eventful. My family and I celebrated my oldest daughter’s 11th bEarthday so you can imagine the running around that I had to do . Luckily for me, my daughter did not have many bEarthday wishes so I was able to make her smile and spend some much-needed quality time with the Tribe (my name for my children).

Well, near the end of last year, I made some changes to my plans for this year—major changes and I have dedicated much of my down time to reflection, self-work, womb work, meditation, yoga, exercise, etc. I am doing the work to allow me to continue to work for others and help others reach their highest potential. Through the periods of self-reflection, I have had to deal with some issues and emotions that are not very pleasant—feelings of regret, stagnation, hurt, disappointment. But, I am doing so much better and am feeling more grounded than I ever have before. I realize that if I am going to do the work that I came to do , I must heal myself, work  on myself, and continue to push the limits of myself.

Through this journey, I have unfortunately lost people and at times caused others to feel hostile towards me. It is obvious to me that I evidently am doing something right for people to be up in arms about my lifestyle. I am unapologetic about the path I have chosen and I am going to be going even deeper this year and going forward. There are people who are cheering for me, seeking me for guidance, and searching for me all simultaneously. I much rather focus on the positive aspects of my so called unconventional lifestyle than the negativity that seemingly attempts to evade my sacred space. So, I will continue to carry crystals in my pocket, sage my space when needed, meditate, give offerings to ancestors, be guided by the moon, and commune with the Sun. I am on a journey and it is just beginning…..

 

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

Peace 2016!

Wow I have to say that this year gone by quite rapidly! We are literally staring the year 2017 down the throat and I am super HYPE!! But before I continue, let me just say that I hope you all are well and as always much love and peace to you. Now, about the coming year, I am not one for resolutions but I felt compelled to challenge myself to a few things in the new year.

  1. I challenge myself to take more risks. I admittedly have played it safe in the past but this coming year will be a year of me stepping outside of the norm—going places I have never been, meeting new people, eating new foods, trying new things. Opening yourself to new experiences allows you to grow in different ways. And I realize I have again grown comfortable so I know it’s time to do something different.
  2. I challenge myself to continue to seek new opportunities to give back to my community. This year, I have found it very challenging to be as active as I was in the city. I now reside in a very rural area and if you are not aligned with a church, often you are shunned or questioned but I am stepping up to the challenge and breaking the status quo. My people need me and I plan to do various community service projects throughout the year.
  3. I challenge myself to love more. In the past when I have loved, I have been hurt but hasn’t everyone. I will not allow past hurts and disappointments to hold me captive to my authentic self. I am genuinely loving and I have so so much to give. I will love on myself more first and foremost and will continue to love others as well.
  4. I challenge myself to be open to being alone. I know you may be thinking that why should one want to be alone but I say being alone and being lonely are two entirely different things. What can I say, life happens and I am fine with it but I know what I want and I will choose me before I settle for less than what I want and deserve. So, 2017 will be a year of finding more of me and being okay with that.
  5. I challenge myself to go deeper into my spirituality. Yes, I have an altar and give offerings, meditate, say affirmations, etc but I am not always consistent. It’s time for me to kick everything up a notch and go deeper.

As you can see, none of my challenges included me getting more money, more things, a new man, or anything tangible. My challenged are all about growth. I have grown to realize that the more I go inward and expand, the more my outer reality changes for the good. I do hope you all are thinking of your own growth and are actually interested in progressing. Because, if you are not moving forward, you are most definitely standing still! I am so happy you have chosen to read my blog, connect with me, and support me this year! Next year will be even better—just you watch!

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

What is a Revolutionary?

Peace, love, and light fam! As always, I hope this message finds you in a peaceful space and place. I have been thinking and reading a lot about the concept of revolution, the role of revolutionaries, as well as what is perceived as revolutionary acts. We are in a very peculiar time, a time of apprehension, and acute awareness of a very changed world and country. With the election of Donald Trump, much has been brought to light as far as to the regular Joes who really believed that most people were not prejudiced. They truly had the notion that their neighbors were cool until this election season. Many people showed their true colors and an air and atmosphere of hostility exists in so many communities and cities abroad.

I have been teaching and spreading the message of the broadened concept of revolution via a hashtag #BeingRevolutionaryIsNotWhatYouThink for some time now. I had to take a seat and really meditate on what being a revolutionary really is. I think that the concept is most certainly multi-faceted. It is not all about physical fights even though I know and understand that there is a time and place for revolutionary activity to involve physical combat. But, being and living as a revolutionary is varied. We all have a place and position to play. Growing food on land that you own is revolutionary, educating your children on true history, not the miseducation that is pumped through the classrooms of the public school system is revolutionary, embracing and infusing our culture into our lives is revolutionary, feeding and clothing our less fortunate brothers and sisters is revolutionary. It is not simply spreading information. Knowledge is useless unless it is applied. Can you make the information that you provide beneficial to the people by showing and proving? How can it be applied? I could go on and on and on but you must get my point by now.

Find your place and do what you can to help liberate your people. If you see a need and you are able to fill the need, do it! Don’t sit around and complain about what needs to happen, be the solution. We have enough lecturers. We need boots on the ground. Our people are waiting  for you. We are the saviors we have been waiting for. I know and overstand that every single time that I blog, disseminate information, sell healthy bath products, assist a sistar with finding more healthy ways of living, teach my children more of our history, challenge my fellow comrades to do more, I am behaving in a revolutionary stance. I am a lover within this war but I love hard and tough. Some of our people need correction. So many are seeking the limelight but it is an absolute waste of time if you are not using the light to help the people. We must not be selfish in our pursuits. We are too reactionary. I have been seeing so much bickering online and I am left feeling depleted. I know we will not be on the same page in all things but to be openly bashing others in the struggle is unacceptable. I see a whole lot of bitching and moaning which is deflecting from what is truly important.

Now is the time for strategic moves. The revolution is now. There is much going on; from the bombing and warring in Aleppo, to the election of Trump, to the last actions of Obama, and so on and so forth. We are literally inundated with information and all types of activities that it can be overwhelming. It is my belief that we must take actions in our immediate locations and be of assistance for bigger issues as the need shows fit, such as issues continuing in Flint, MI. There is so much we can do. Time out for the bullshit. So, the ball is now in your court. Are you riding the bench or are you in the game? The team needs you. Time is always of the essence. And the time is now.

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali

 

“I for one believe that if you give people a thorough understanding of what confronts them and the basic causes that produce it, they’ll create their own program, and when the people create a program, you get action.”

-Malcolm X

 

Working On Self

Peace and love fam and happy Monday! As always, I hope you had an awesome day today. I have been in reflection mode. It seems more and more of my days are being spent this way—quietly in my own thoughts. Today, I was thinking about the value of stimulating conversation and being exposed to good, positive energy.

I realize that I have wasted so much precious time on meaningless conversations and interactions. I also realize that I have participated in these conversations and interactions and could have chosen to change subjects or removed myself and I didn’t. But, now that I know better, I must do better. I have been very fortunate to connect with some great people and in turn, my experiences have begun to improve. They challenge me to think, to explore, to love more, to be open to new experiences.

As this year comes to a close, I am focusing on doing better in many areas and working on improving myself. There are people who are not around anymore that I never would have imagined would be absent. There are new people in my life who I could have never imagined would be in my life. And I am grateful for it all. Life is very cyclical and I feel I am coming full circle. I am choosing experiences that will help me on my journey of self-improvement. It is time to focus on raising my vibration and maturation on my spiritual walk. If it doesn’t resonate with me, I must remove myself.

I have found so much joy in being more selective in who I choose to be in the company of and in doing the things that are in my best interest. I have had to become more selfish with myself. I am looking to gain energy from interactions that I am involved in. At a certain point, I became depleted because I was constantly giving to people who were not giving anything to me in return. And when I say giving, I do not mean gifts or anything tangible, I mean giving positivity and great energy back to me. Remember the old saying “you cannot pour from an empty vessel”?  Well, let’s just say my vessel only had a few drops left.

I am looking to begin 2017 on a high note—full of abundance, creativity, and progress. It is time to step into my own! I am acutely aware of the state of my people but I choose to shed light not throw shade. I am here to nurture, to heal, to guide, to love. I have so much work to do. But, before I can give all that I can and am, I have to be fully in tune with myself. Let the self work and growth continue!

 

 

Hetepu,

Ashaki Ma’at Mirembe Ali